Litany for I'm Sorry

I had planned to post a litany today about Trump and Hillary (and about Jesus), which I feel pretty excited about sharing. But I just can’t do it; it will have to wait. I can’t turn off all the feelings I feel about the Orlando shooting. I can’t stop thinking about it. I can’t stop thinking about how a specific community of people was targeted and systematically put to death in cold blood by a maniac. I have had to monitor my intake of news about it, lest it overwhelm me completely. I feel guilty saying that sentence because some people don’t have a choice about whether or not this thing will overwhelm them, because it has definitely, without a doubt, overwhelmed them with sorrow, grief, loss, lament, pain, despair, hopelessness.

And then I read some folks criticizing church folks for waiting until now, until something completely tragic and unthinkable has happened, to extend any kindness toward the LGBT community. Which is kind-of valid, church. Although it’s also kind-of valid that a lot of us have been loving and welcoming LGBT folks all along we just haven’t made any headlines about it. So that feels kind-of dismissive, but then again maybe we should have been a little louder about our love. But then again we’ve all just been doing our damndest to live well in the context we are in, to see as far as our horizon will let us, and try to be some kind of bridge people between the ideologies that keep us in tension all the stinking time. Which is exhausting but I shouldn’t be complaining because I’m not the one getting persecuted and gunned down and I probably don’t even know the meaning of exhausted in comparison.

Do you see the complexity here? Do you see how many feelings it might be possible for anyone on any side of this to feel? Do you see the rabbit holes it is possible for a person’s mind to go down, how many guilts it is possible to internalize, how many sorrows it is possible to become engulfed by, how frustrated it is possible to get? Or is that just me?

Let me dial this down for us:
God loves human beings; that’s God’s thing. If we are not about the business of loving human beings, then we are not doing God’s thing; we are doing something else, and woe to us.

To the LGBTQ community, in which I have friends and family and beloved folks:
I’m sorry I didn’t live my love louder before now.
I’m sorry the society we live in left the door wide open for this to happen, and for all the ways I’m complicit in that society.
I’m sorry the church-section I’m a part of has done such a shitty job of loving you, and for all the ways I’ve been complicit in that.
I’m sorry for every time I’ve ever missed an opportunity to love you, to listen to you, or to walk beside you in companionable silence.
I’m sorry we haven’t gotten far enough along in our relationship to trust one another with deep things.

I believe that Jesus is for you.
I believe that the Kingdom of God, inaugurated by Jesus, is for you.
I believe that when Jesus says, “Come to me all you who are weary and heavy-laden and I will give you rest,” He means you, too.
I believe that God made you, God loves you, and God is pouring out love upon love indiscriminately on you all your life.

I want to do better at getting in line with God’s agenda on that.
I want to do better at trading stories with you and hearing your heart.
Forgive me.

God:
We, the church, Your body on earth, turn to You in humility and contrition, confessing our failure at loving our LBGTQ brothers and sisters well.

We’ve insulated ourselves.
We’ve turned a blind eye to injustice.
We’ve perpetuated misunderstanding.
We’ve capitulated to fear.
We’ve withheld help and concern.
We’ve cheapened the grace of Jesus.
We’ve forgotten that, of faith, hope, and love; love is greatest.

We know that where we are inadequate, You are more than enough.
We know that there is always redemption when Jesus is around.
We know that Jesus is always where the pain is.

Our hearts mourn for the pain we have caused.
We are sorry.
Help us to be better at following the Way of Love.

Amen
 

Litany for Repentance From Bigotry

Yesterday I had the poignant honor of reading two of my litanies, one for an interfaith vigil honoring and mourning those 50 LGBTQ+ persons killed in the attack in Orlando, and another at a subsequent vigil hosted by Austin Pride.  A couple of Muslim leaders spoke, calling for an end to violence, extolling the mercy and compassion of God. Several members of the LGBTQ+ community spoke, exhorting the community to combat hate with love. The mayor of Austin and a few other local politicians spoke. A Rabbi gave a lovely blessing and sang peace over us. A handful of Christians spoke (I actually prefer the term Follower of Jesus, but, ahem), myself included along with Ben, one of the pastors of my church.

I hardly know how I got there, except I know somebody who knows somebody, and so forth, and Ben brought me along, and somehow following Jesus tends to take us to unexpected places (the glorious run-on sentence of faith-life). I am nobody these people know, so why should they listen to me? I have no title, nor am I technically a vocational “faith leader.” And yet, there I was, hands full of prayers I’ve written, being handed a microphone. Prayers about grief, terrorism, justice and equality, suffering. The best I could offer to a wounded community.

I thanked God that I had written these prayers, that they were ready and available and potentially helpful in a time of deep tragedy, at the same time that I felt sad that I’d ever had to write such prayers; sad that we must have language for such grief.

In between the two vigils, a group of hundreds of us marched down the streets of Austin with a police escort, from one vigil to another, demonstrating our solidarity with those who have been lost, and with the vibrant community who lost them. I had never been to an event like this. I had never even considered events like this to be of much use; obviously, I got schooled. I’d never really understood the point of marching. I’d never understood that marching is more about the hearts of the people who march than it is about observers or political statements or news-making.

Marching, Marching, down Congress

I thought of that horde of folks, marching around the Galilean countryside, traipsing after Jesus; they had gotten so focused on following that they neglected to bring food. They needed Jesus to feed them in more ways than one. I thought of Jesus’ compassion on them, on their hunger, when he could have said too bad so sad you dummies walked out into the wilderness uninvited with no food. What must those folks have felt as they marched? What was happening in their hearts? I can tell you I still don’t fully understand marching but I have a new appreciation for it.  There is something to be said for walking with people.

I am not a part of the LGBTQ+ community, not even peripherally. But I have a new level of love for those folks and what they’ve endured, what they are still enduring. I want to stand in solidarity with them in their grief and loss and fear and in the great temptation to give hate for hate. I have been given a new heart, yet again. As I spoke to folks and looked in their eyes I felt anew the love of God for each person, going out, going out, going out; just like it always does.

A bigot is a person who is intolerant of people who have a different way of thinking. I have never considered myself a bigot (who does?). In fact I have tried hard to NOT be a bigot. I know a few bigots and they aren’t pleasant people (and yet the Love of God is going out, going out, going out to them). But I think there are ways bigotry slips in unacknowledged. I think there are ways I have been bigoted without even realizing it. There are patterns of thought my mind has followed that were maybe taught to me, or maybe assumed, and that maybe ignorance has perpetuated.

So I offer this prayer, along with an invitation for you to come alongside me in praying it.

Compassionate God,
Have mercy on us sinners.

We confess our blindness.
We confess our small-mindedness.
We confess our tendency to think that what we think about the hearts of others is always true.
We confess our judgment and suspicion of things and people unfamiliar to or different from us.
We confess our inability to perfectly follow the Way of Love.

Of bigotry, we repent.
Of condemnation, we repent.
Of lack of compassion, we repent.
Of ignorance, we repent.
Of unwillingness to walk with people You love, we repent.

Keep on giving us new hearts.
Keep on shaping our minds and our perspectives.
Keep on training us in the Way of Love.
Keep on refreshing our understanding of Jesus.
Keep on expanding our minds, even as Your Kingdom is expanding.
Don’t give up on us, even when we are stubborn and self-righteous.

Amen

Litany for Victims of Sexual Violence

The story of “Emily Doe’s” rape by an over-privileged white male athlete who was convicted but given a light jail sentence is deeply troubling. Her valiant fight and speaking out against rape culture is, however, inspiring and necessary. Thanks to Emily Doe, light is being shed on ways that this country is tolerant of rape, lenient toward money and privilege, prejudiced against women victims, and still has far to go in regards to equality. It’s a good thing our faith is not in the political or judicial systems because those are miserably failing. Jesus’ good kingdom is our only hope. We pray and hope and work for better.

If you're using this litany in a congregational or group setting, I recommend omitting the "We acknowledge" section. For the purpose of personal prayer, I feel that section contains worthwhile reminders about Jesus and his ideas about power.


God, our hearts are hurting for our sisters and brothers who have been victims
  of rape, sexual abuse, violence.
Help us to help and care for them, and stand in solidarity with them.

For those who are victims of sexual violence we pray
Lord, have mercy.
For those whose bodies and minds have been violated
Christ, have mercy.
For those who have been overpowered physically or emotionally
Be their refuge.
For those who have felt helpless
Be their stronghold and help in trouble.
For those who have borne up under sexual abuse
Be their comfort and healer.
For those who have felt too damaged in body or mind to go on
Be their hope.
For those whom the legal system has failed,
Fight for them, Oh God.

We acknowledge that violence is not the way of Jesus.
We acknowledge that Jesus never forces his way on us, but wins us.
We acknowledge that Christ awaits our consent to enter our hearts and lives.
We acknowledge that Christ loved and respected people from all walks of life, all genders.
We acknowledge that Christ did not wield physical power over people, but healed and forgave.
We acknowledge that justice belongs to You, and we can trust You for it.
We acknowledge that Christ came to save the world;
    the victim and the perpetrator,
    the rich and the underprivileged,
    the foolish and the wise.

God, hear our prayer:
We ask for justice,
     understanding that we may not see it this side of eternity.
We ask for peace,
     which the Spirit of God is always offering here and now.
We ask for mercy,
     for violence to cease.
We ask for rest,
     that those traumatized may sleep each night in the peace of Your presence.
We ask for redemption,
     for the perpetrators to repent and make amends.
We ask for healing,
     for deep wounds to be mended.
We ask for forgiveness,
     that victims may be free from seeking revenge,
     and perpetrators may be made new by the forgiveness of Christ.

May Your kingdom come on earth.
May Your love abound to all, redeeming all.

Amen
 

Litany for Loving Those With Whom We Disagree

God of Love, fill us anew with the energy of your love
For we find ourselves in conflict and disagreement with our sisters and brothers;
But we want Your heart to move us.

We confess our tendency to cast judgement on those whose ideas differ from ours.
We confess our tendency to consider ourselves superior.
We confess our tendency to blame, call names, castigate, and demean.
We confess our tendency to speak truth in righteous indignation, and not in love.
We confess our tendency to use sarcasm as a weapon of righteousness.
We confess our tendency to obsess about being right.

Help us to have patience with those who do not share our perspective.
Help us to have grace for those we consider to be in the wrong.
Help us to extend forgiveness to those who hurt us or those close to us.

May we find, in each circumstance, those places where we are complicit.
May we attend to the log in our own eye.
May we remember that the good news of the Kingdom of God is steadily creeping in,
   That fear, defensiveness, and violence are alien to it;
   That peace, beauty, and gentleness are its hallmarks.
May we compass our movements by Love’s true north.

We relinquish our need to win arguments.
We relinquish our need to demonstrate our superior worldview.
In those opportunities we get to peaceably speak our opinion, may we do it with
    Love
    Joy
    Peace
    Patience
    Kindness
    Goodness
    Faithfulness
    Gentleness
    Self-control
And may Christ be glorified by our every word and action.

Amen

Litany for Boldness (and Bonhoeffer)

Yesterday was the anniversary of the death of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, the German pastor and theologian who opposed the Nazi regime and was martyred in 1945.

God, we are reminded that Love is action.
As You actively love the world, we must actively love each other.
We must push past our comfort zones, reticence, and general inertia,
Allowing ourselves to be moved by the engine of Love.

We confess our tendency to withdraw.
We confess our desire to put our own safety and convenience above all.
We confess our quickness to downplay the needs of the poor, the plight of injustice.
We confess that we would often prefer to ignore the evil in our midst.
We confess that we often value our reputation above following Christ.
We confess our self-centeredness.

We ask for hearts aflame with the Love of Christ.
We ask for patience to endure suffering.
We ask for courage to pray for and love our enemies.
We ask for strength to accomplish the work of peace.

Where injustice, poverty, and wrong-doing abound,
May we do justly, love mercy, and walk humbly.
When laziness and complicity would overwhelm us,
May we be empowered by Your spirit to renew our efforts.

We look to Christ, the model of loving sacrifice,
And to those saints throughout the ages who have lived and died for the cause of Love.
May we listen and act with confidence and boldness,
And find our reward in the joy of Your presence.

Amen

Litany for Our Enemies + That Time I Accidentally Told My Kid About ISIS

*I'm sharing a story along with a litany today. I usually try to keep strictly to the prayers, but maybe sometimes a story will give context for how a litany can be a useful place to go, a useful tool in a kit for coping with the reality of evil and posturing ourselves towards Jesus.

I accidentally told my 5 year old daughter about ISIS. Oops.

The conversation started at bedtime, as many of our deep conversations do, in those still moments when mostly I’m feeling antsy and ready to be done parenting for the day but am trying to remain present and sing songs, talk quietly, help them decompress for sleep. I don’t even really remember how we got started, but I was caught off guard and unprepared for the line of questioning, and ISIS has been on my mind so therefore I let the ISIS cat out of the bag. I also have this pesky value for telling my kids the truth that sometimes trips me up.

I think we were talking about kindness, and in the context of that I said the word “violence.”

What’s violence?
It’s doing things that hurt people.
Like being mean?
Yes. We want to be kind, not violent.
But some people are violent?
Yes, some people are.
You mean some people are mean?
Yes.
Where do they live?
Well, there are mean people everywhere, but I don’t think you know any.
(My kid just learned that mean people exist. Hallelujah. Christ, have mercy.)
But WHERE ARE THEY?
Well, there are some mean people in a place far away called the Middle East, they call themselves ISIS.
(Oh I have done it now. Instant regret. No turning back now.)
What do they do? Do they kill people?
Yes, they do. They do violence.
How do they do it? With bow and arrows? With guns?
(Here is where my head is finally on straight and I refuse to mention bombs. I deflect, for better or worse.)
Why do they do it?
I think they are confused about what God’s way is. God’s way is love, peace, and beauty.
Do they have neighbors and friends? Do they try to hurt them?
They have neighbors; I don’t know if they have friends.
Are they sad and lonely?
I think they might be.
What do the neighbors do?
I think some try to help them change, and some try to move away to a safer place.
THAT MAKES ME SO SAD. I’M GONNA CRY NOW, MAMA.

You and me both, sister. Now, let me pause here and say that this is an abbreviated version of the conversation, and that my mind was churning with how best to respond. There were a lot of other questions. (Do they wear red and black clothes? They wear regular clothes.) (How do you know about them? I read the news.) She is a very empathetic soul, and I don’t want her up in the night worrying about terrorists and refugees at age 5. But I do want to give her a place to go with the sorrow. So I say:

Jesus tells us to “love our enemies and pray for those who persecute us.”
What’s persecute?
Be mean to. Would you like to pray for ISIS and their neighbors?
Yes!
Jesus please bless the people of ISIS. Please show them your way of love, peace, and beauty. Please change their hearts and show them kindness. Help them not to be confused about God’s way.
AND HELP THEIR NEIGHBORS MOVE!
Help their neighbors find a safe place. Help the mean people become kind.
AMEN.

I held hands with my sweet little daughter, lying in her little bed, and prayed for the redemption of ISIS. This is the story of how my parenting gaffe made possible a moment of impossible beauty and sadness. My head is still swimming with it. And isn’t this typical of Jesus? To hide a core of beauty within apparent sadness? Isn’t this exactly what happened on Resurrection Day? So, there is sadness that my child must eventually have the knowledge of good and evil, and that other children live in the lap of evil daily; but there is beauty that THERE IS ALWAYS PRAYER. There is always a beautiful way to follow. There is always hope. And there is always, always forgiveness and redemption.

I invite you to pray now:

Resurrected Jesus, we call upon your mercy now.
We ask you to turn your attention to our enemies, those who do violence and terror, who kill and destroy.
Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.
We ask you to bless, love, and redeem them; to show them the kindness of your heart.
We ask you to lovingly clear up their misunderstanding of God’s way.
We ask you to care for and protect those innocents around them.
We ask you to bring them all, violent and innocent, into the safety of your kingdom.
Amen
 

Litany for a Terrorized City

*I originally wrote this litany as a response to the attack on Brussels on March 22, 2016. I later learned that many other places in the world were attacked by ISIS during the surrounding time period, attacks that never made headline news. This litany can be used to pray for folks in any location that has experienced terrorism. I wish it weren't true that we might have use for a general prayer for terrorized cities. Christ, have mercy.

God, we cry out to You on behalf of the people of [Brussels, Belgium].
     For the families and friends of those killed in the attacks, we cry.
     For those wounded, we cry.
     For the bystanders, those shocked and terrified, we cry.
     For the emergency workers, giving tirelessly of themselves, we cry.
     For those in government and law enforcement, we cry.
     For the residents of the city, stranded and immobilized, we cry.
     For a world beset by evil, we cry.

We commend the souls lost into Your care,
And ask for healing and comfort for those that remain.

These events bring us into a place of questioning:
     Of Your goodness
     Of Your sovereignty
     Of the nature of humanity
     Of the future of the world
     Of how we might move forward.

We commend those questions into Your care,
     Asking You for wisdom
     Asking You for hope
     Asking You for courage to continue on in good work
     Asking You for help in overcoming
     Asking You for comfort in trouble
     Asking You for a heart of love toward our enemies
     Asking You for justice.

We acknowledge that our lives are precious, vulnerable, and often short.
We acknowledge that safety is never guaranteed.
We acknowledge our inability to perfectly follow Jesus’ example
     of meekness, forgiveness, and peacemaking.
We acknowledge that when Jesus took upon himself the wrongdoing of the world,
he took terrorism also.

We look toward the completion of Jesus’ work.
We look toward the fullness of Your kingdom come,
And Your will done on earth as it is in heaven. 
We look toward the day when the whole world is aligned with the law of love.

Be near to the brokenhearted, close in Your compassion and lovingkindness, Generous in Your giving of understanding.

Amen

Litany for Creation Care

Creator God, whose art and beauty are evident in every molecule of Creation, You made the universe - planets and solar systems, earth-home, plants, creatures - and called it good.
You made human life the pinnacle of that work, even choosing to incarnate that work in the Person of Jesus; and giving humanity those great and terrible gifts: choice and dominion.

Receive our confession now.

We have regarded your Creation only as a resource to be spent, not as a gift to be stewarded.
We have polluted air, water, and land.
We have destroyed ecosystems and species.
We have exploited and razed entire sections of earth.
We have created mountains of unnecessary waste.
We have valued material wealth and convenience above the health of our bodies and those under our care.
We have forgotten our own temporality, that other generations will come after us needing a home.
We have forgotten that You created life and it is precious.

Where we should have stewarded, we exploited.
Where we should have protected, we left vulnerable.
Where we should have respected, we chose to disregard.

Grant that we may come to a new hope and understanding of Your Creation, our relationship with it, and our role within it.
Grant that we may find ways to participate in its healing and renewal.
Grant that we may become willing to develop new habits and ways of interacting with the world, that consider its beauty and welfare.
Grant that we may re-imagine prosperity, economy, and civilization in light of stewardship of Creation.
Grant that we may more deeply understand Your nature through your Creation.
Grant that we may more deeply understand the interdependence of humanity and earth.
Grant that we may extend the work of Christ on the cross to a creation groaning and waiting expectantly.
Grant that we may have a renewed hope for the future of Creation - redeemed, reconciled, restored to its proper place and function.

May gratitude and the love of Christ govern our every interaction with humans, creatures, and the earth.

Amen.

Litany for November 2015

Oh Great God, we lean upon your compassion and mercy today. Our hearts are troubled, our minds disturbed, and our spirits reach out to you for the sake of our sisters and brothers across the world.
Bring true justice to the world, Oh God.

We lift up the families in Kenya whose loved ones were murdered in the attack on Garissa University.
Give them comfort, Oh God.
We lift up those around the world who are bought and sold into slavery, with little hope of escape.
Give them hope, Oh God.
We lift up those refugees fleeing their home countries, Syria and others, because their lives are endangered and terrorized by war and corruption.
Give them respite, Oh God.
We lift up those in Japan whose homes and livelihoods were destroyed by earthquake.
Give them shelter, Oh God.
We lift up those living and dying amidst civil war in Yemen
Give them safety, Oh God.
We lift up the loved ones of those killed by suicide bombers in Beirut, Lebanon, and those who were wounded in the attacks there.
Give them healing, Oh God.
We lift up the people of Paris, those whose lives were extinguished by bombers and gunmen, and those who remain in mourning.
Give them peace, Oh God.

Where there are violence, terror, war, and trauma,
Bring the Way of Peace.
Where there are suffering, mourning, and heavy hearts,
Bring the Balm of Gilead.

We cling to the hope of Christ, whose kingdom is now and not yet, coming and near; whose ways are unexpected, whose love never fails, and whose justice will rule the earth.
Come, Lord Jesus

Grant us ways to participate in advancing your kingdom and your justice, through prayer, service, hospitality, generosity, kindness, and love.

We say with the Psalmist:

      Your love, O Lord, reaches to the heavens,
      Your faithfulness to the skies.
      Your righteousness is like the highest mountains,
      Your justice like the great deep.

Amen

Litany for Reconciliation, Confession, and Forgiveness

To you, God, we turn to have our hearts filled with love.
Give us new wine skins and fill them with new wine.

We remember that your love is for all people, and that the blood of Christ was shed for all:
For the accepted and for the marginalized
For the poor and the wealthy
For the weak and the powerful
For the ill and the healthy
For the simple and the nuanced

We remember that forgiveness does not have regard for the nature of sin; it merely smiles, nods, and sends it on its way; irrevocable, irretrievable.

Hallelujah.

We confess our tendency to think we are better than others.
We confess our pride in minimizing our own sins.
We confess our being blindly certain of our limited understanding.
We confess our snatching the right to judge out of the hand of Jesus, whom we say we trust.
We confess our letting go of our God-given right: to love our neighbor.
We confess our worship of our own ideas about Jesus, rather than the actual Person of Jesus.

It is to that Person that we cry now:

Have mercy on us according to your unfailing love, according to your great compassion. Blot out all our iniquity and lead us in the way everlasting.

Amen